


Razzle Dazzle 'em

by Nakimochiku



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Skating, Fluff, M/M, Olympics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-13
Updated: 2016-11-13
Packaged: 2018-08-30 17:14:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8541829
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nakimochiku/pseuds/Nakimochiku
Summary: In which retired figure skating champion Levi Ackerman trains Olympic rookie Eren Jaeger, and feelings are developed along the way.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I've literally had this story done for years. I started writing this during the Sochi olympics. that should tell you plenty. I decided fuck it, lemme post this damn story.

Levi watches from the boards, a pair of hard guards in one hand and a half finished Tim Hortons hot chocolate in the other, gone cold in the rink air. He’s not _nervous_ as Hanji would say, just cautious. It’s his first time coaching, and he wants to take in his charge’s merits before he meets or sees him, before he has the chance to put on an act in some sort of sorry attempt to impress him.

Eren Jaeger isn’t looking at any of the other Olympic hopefuls and he doesn’t look particularly unnerved by their presence. He fixes his skates, tucking the extra length of his laces inside them. He pulls on his gloves. He steps out onto the ice as though stepping into battle, and slides immediately into his warm ups. He doesn’t even see Levi as he zooms passed him, blades shaving the ice and leaving behind a spray of snow. He has potential, Levi admits, tossing guards and paper cup to step out onto the ice.

For a moment, Levi hears the roar of the crowd, feels a flood of adrenaline like muscle memory. Then the rush is gone, and Levi is skating lazily over to where Eren reaches both arms up, trying for graceful and falling miserably short.

“Eren Jaeger.” He says. Eren turns, eyes blazing with something that might be irritation, before the look immediately melts into starry eyed awe that Levi frankly wasn’t expecting. Friendly, he could deal with, some sort of kiss ass, he could expect. But that awe is strange, like he’s found living proof of god, like he’s witnessed the big bang first hand.

“Holy shit.” Eren breathes, and almost trips over his own blades skating the small distance to Levi. “It’s an honour to be working with you Coach Ackerman sir, it’s—“

“Just call me Levi, kid, Christ.” Levi grouses. He raises an eyebrow at the kid, looks him up and down. “Won’t be such an honour by the time I’m through with you.” The kid bares his teeth in a grin, green gold eyes sparkling. He looks vicious.

“Better make that a promise, sir.”

*

If Eren wasn’t half good, he wouldn’t have made it onto the team to begin with, but anyone can see there are no high hopes pinned to him. He throws himself into training the way a drowning man throws himself at a life raft, like it’s the only thing that  matters to him.

“The hell are you doing stamping around like that?” Levi snaps, skating over to Eren to jerk his arms into the proper position, kicking at the blades of his skates until they move where he wants. “You look like a drunk elephant. Grace, Jaeger, I wanna see grace, is that so much to ask?”

“No sir.” Eren says, and kicks off to try again. Truth be told, Levi doesn’t know why he wants to see grace when ferocity suits him so much better, but he wants to force Eren to grow.

“Having a good time?” Hanji comes to an abrupt stop beside him. She doesn’t take her eyes off the pair she’s training, clapping her hands to keep time, but tosses him a smile. “Oh, you look malicious, is he really as bad as I’ve heard?”

Levi frowns. “What do you mean? He’s not bad.”

“Well.” The way she says the one word tells Levi he’s in for quite a story. “You know that we’re all training Olympic rookies here.” Levi nods slowly, eyes following Eren’s form as he swings forward in an axle, only to land squarely on his ass.

“Match your swing, Eren, you’re too early.” Levi yells. He can see Eren’s eyes sparking all the way across the rink in the fluorescent lights. “What were you saying?”

“Well I heard from my pair that it was a fluke Eren qualified for this year’s Olympics, and it was the poor performance of other skaters at the world championship that allowed him to score enough points to qualify.”

“If he performs the best, then it isn’t a fluke he qualifies.” Levi replies stiffly, and maybe Eren isn’t much to brag about, but he’s his charge, and Levi will defend him. “It’s not his fault they performed poorly.”

Hanji holds her hands palms up. “This is only what I heard from them. I’m just informing you.” She looks at Eren just as he kisses the ice again. She smiles a look of pity and waves. “Good luck.”

Hanji means well, but sometimes Levi just wants to punch her.

“Eren.” He calls before he can start rehearsing his program again. He blinks at him and skates over like a puppy. “Let’s go somewhere, get a snack. My treat.”

“Can we get ice cream?” Levi rolls his eyes.

“Just this once, you immature brat.”

*

Eren is just starting to nibble on his waffle cone when Levi says, “Someone told me it’s a fluke you’re even here.” The almost innocent, almost happy, expression on Eren’s face melts and curls into a snarl like a burning photograph, and it’s amazing to watch a kid so cute make faces so vicious.

“I worked hard to get here.” He growls.

“I know.” Levi answers blandly, and spoons another cold glob of frozen yogurt into his mouth. He sees it every day, every time Eren gets up, brushes the snow from his knees and tries again.

“Maybe I’m not the best.” Eren acknowledges, voice curling slow around the words. Levi blinks, waits for more. “Maybe I’m not the best, but I try my best, and that should be enough for them.”

“It should be.” Levi agrees. His frozen yogurt has gone soupy, and he grimaces at it in disgust.

“Sir.” Eren’s voice is so small, Levi drags his gaze up to meet Eren’s. “I’ve always thought you were the best at skating, even after… I’ve always thought you were the best. If there’s anyone who can make me worthy of the Olympics, it’s you, sir.”

Levi stirs his spoon through his melted dessert thoughtfully, and shakes his head. The hero worship tastes bitter sweet, but… “I don’t make you worthy, Eren. Nothing I do can help you. It’s your hard work that will make you worthy. You have to get there on your own.” Eren nods, eyes glinting and mouth thinned to a determined line. “Good, now that the sap fest is over, let’s get back to training.”

“You believe I can win gold, sir?”

Levi looks back at Eren from where he stands at the door to the Baskin Robins, and Eren blinks almost innocently, hopefully, back at him, ice cream smeared around his mouth like a child, napkin crumpled in one fist. “Eren I believe you can do anything at all.” He tosses out his paper cup and beckons Eren. He doesn’t need to add anything else, because he finds he means it, and that’s enough for Eren.

*

“Here to check on your cousin?” Erwin calls over the boards. Levi looks up from his laces to look over Erwin’s shoulder. There’s Mikasa, long muscled leg extended as she does a lazy camel spin. She pauses to have what look like heated words with a blonde girl who flicks her a disinterested glance and falls into her warm ups.

“Nah.” Levi says, and tugs his laces tighter. “But since you’re here, how is she doing?”

“Good I think.” Erwin smiles wanly. “Annie Leonhardt either brings out the best or the worst in her, I can’t tell which yet.”

“The blonde girl?” at Erwin’s nod, Levi looks up, watches the two girls skate around each other, two stars drawn towards each other, revolving around each other, but some negative energy slides them away from each other like repelling magnets. Annie Leonhardt is an ice queen, cool, aloof, drawing swirls in the ice as she spins. As if to directly contrast her, Mikasa ignites, cross cuts chopping the ice viciously, each movement emotional where Annie’s are measured.

Levi hasn’t seen her so worked up since she was little, lips pouting and hockey helmet on her little head, scrabbling to keep up with him, tripping over her own toe picks.

“She’s bringing out the best in her.” He says definitively and slips into his other skate to begin tightening that one. “She needs to be reminded that she’s not the best, needs a little competition sometimes.”

“Sometimes I feel like a referee to a brawl.” Erwin sighs. He turns to look at them too, sighs again. “They’d make a beautiful pair though.”

“Don’t get any ideas now, Smith, you deviant.”

“Look at that energy. Like the black and white chess queens facing off. I can see it in my head.”

“Just like you to utilize the feelings of other people.” Erwin moves back from the boards so Levi can join him on ice. Eren’s late, but he’ll ream the kid for it later, he’s busy watching a pseudo fight. He doesn’t go talk to Mikasa even when she breaks for water, per her wishes, but later tonight he will text her, ask her what’s going on between her and that Annie girl. They would make a beautiful pair, but he’s not going to tell Erwin he agrees with him.

He doesn’t need the ego boost.

*

It occurs to Levi briefly to cut in before the altercation on the ice can become a full blown scrap. But Eren's holding his own, and he's certain the kid wouldn't want him fighting his battles.

None of the kids seem to realize a coach is watching, so they don't have the good sense to stop Eren and Jean from ripping into each other.

"How are you an olympic skater when you can't even land a damn axel?" Jean sneers.  "You know that's a requirement right?"

"Yeah whatever." Eren scoffs, unfazed. "At least I'm not too much of a chicken shit to pull a death drop."

Jean looks affronted, one hand held up over his chest. "It's not that I can't pull it," he struggles to recover. "I just like the flying camel better."

"I didn't say you couldn't do it, kirstein. I said you were chicken shit." Connie has the audacity to cluck and strut on his toe picks around Jean.

"I'm not chicken shit!" Jean snaps, pushing Connie so hard he nearly tumbles. "I don't wanna hear that from the mistake of the team."

Eren glowers, baring his teeth. "Chicken shit. If I'm the mistake of this team, you're the disappointment." Jean splutters, going red right to his hairline.

"Looks like a flower stings like a bee." Annie mutters. She herself is removed from the situation, just watching the debacle with a bemused sneer. Levi finds her comment wholly fitting.

"You chicken shit though, kirstein? Huh? Will you do it, or nah?" Connie instigates, jabbing Jean in the ribs. Jean slaps him away impatiently, and visibly gulps.

"I'll do it."

Uh oh, levi thinks blandly. This is going to end poorly. Jean’s too afraid of the drop, when it's better to just give to it. He can't fathom why Jean’s afraid of it, when he can pull a perfect axel, but it's enough that he is.

"The hell are you kids doing?" Levi snaps, coming around the edge of the boards. They scatter like flies, hurrying to make themselves look busy. "You think just cause your coaches are late you can slack?"

"No sir." They echo back at him.

"Yeah, that's what I thought. Kirstein, why are you standing there like a dolt? From what I’ve seen your combo spins are lazy at best." Jean shoots one last glare at Eren and skates away, leaving Just Levi and Eren motionless on ice, scraping crosscuts and snowy spins all around them.

Eren bites the inside of his cheek and looks away from Levi's glare like a guilty child caught red handed. "I couldn't let him make fun of me." He says preemptively.

"I know." Levi agrees. "But don't ever try to goad someone into doing something they're afraid of. He would have done it, and he could have gotten hurt, because he couldn't let you make fun of him either."

"Yes sir." Eren whispers solemnly.

“come on.” levi says, settling a gloved hand on his back, idly stroking a thumbs between the just of his shoulderblades. “dont be so down about it. Go do your warm ups.”

*

Most of the rink’s been shut down, rows of lights turning off one by one.  Levi adjusts the weight of his duffle as he shoulders the change room door open. He’d been distracted talking to Hanji, and hadn’t meant to stay so long. He frowns when he hears the scrape of blades on the ice, and the unmistakable thud of someone falling.

He leans on the boards, and he’s hardly surprised to find his charge practicing his axel, and failing it. Eren doesn’t notice him, but it’s probably hard to even see him with only a single row of lights illuminating the empty rink. He flings his arms out, leg kicking forward. For one glorious moment he’s in the air, flying, and then he’s grounded with a heavy thump and a sigh.

“How many times do I have to tell you that you’re swinging into it too early before you correct yourself?” Levi calls, and leaps over the boards, stepping onto the ice in his sneakers. Eren nearly jumps out of his skin. “You can’t practice your mistakes and expect to get better.”

“Yes I know, I’m trying to match it—“

“Are you? Because I’m starting to think you enjoy macking the ice.” Eren flushes and Levi snorts softly. “Either way, what are you practicing your axle for; I thought we agreed to use the lutz instead.”

“It doesn’t matter, I have to learn it. I have to get it right.” Levi raises a brow at him, and the tips of Eren’s ears go red. “The axle is your best jump so…” he trails off awkwardly, picking at snow balled in the fibers of his gloves.

Levi wisely decides to let that sleeping dog lie, and crosses his arms over his chest to scold Eren instead. “And this is why you’ve been late for your last three practices?” Eren looks away guiltily. “You’ve been staying here late practicing instead of going home and getting your sleep?”

“I wanted to surprise you, show you that I could do it.” Eren pleads. “I wanted this to be proof that I’d grown…never mind, it’s stupid.”

Levi sighs heavily. He feels a headache coming on. “If I agree to work with you tonight until you can get an axel, do you promise to stop these nighttime practices?”

Eren beams like Levi’s just promised him Christmas once a month. His heart flutters uncomfortably. “Promise.”

*

“They don’t need free skate Wednesdays.” Levi sighs, pushing open the rink doors and holding it open for Hanji, who has a boom box slung over her shoulder like it's still the nineties.

“If we left things up to you, these kids would be dying of heart attacks and stress.  I made a perfect playmix, and they can enjoy free skate warm ups until we get into crunch time.”

“Hanji, it’s the fucking Olympics, it's always crunch time.”

“Levi, it’s the fucking Olympics. We have three solid years before we get into crunch time.” She sticks her tongue out at him and sets her boombox up on a bench. The rink has a sound system, she just enjoys being archaic.

Of course, the kids love it, and there’s more twerking than actual warming up. They sing way too loudly, voices off pitch, off beat, rebounding in the stadium. Eren comes in a little late and sits beside Levi to do up his skates. “What’s all this?”

“Hanji wanted you kids to have fun.” He puts little air quotes around the word, leans back against the concrete wall to observe the chaos the ice has become. “Go out and join them. I give you permission.” Eren does as he says, skating around his dancing, silly peers, and for a while looks at an utter loss, caught between a desire to work and the temptation of play. Levi smiles to see he joins in as soon as an extremely old Eminem song comes on, and he raps along to it with Connie, who beams at him.

So perhaps free skate Wednesdays weren’t such a bad idea.

“I know that face.” Hanji says as she joins him on the bench.

“What face?” Levi snorts, crossing his arms, watching Eren slalom around his peers playfully.

“The holy shit Hanji was right but I’m too much of a tough ass to admit it face.”

“Go suck an egg.”

Hanji beams, and jostles him with her elbow, gesturing expansively at the ice. “Look how cute he is when he’s happy. Don’t you wanna see him like this all the time?”

Yeah, he does. But admitting as much isn’t worth telling Hanji her damn ideas are good.

*

"I know why they pronounce it “sow” “cow”, Kirstein, cause that's what you look like on ice." Jean and Eren circle each other on their inside edges like prowling wolves. They look a step away from yo' momma jokes.

"Oh shit." Connie gasps whipping his fingers until they snap.

"Connie it isn't two thousand and five, no one does that anymore." Sasha knocks their blades together.

"Maybe not where you're from, chica."

Sasha elbows him hard. "Don’t call me that."

"Alright, alright." Jean sneers. "They call it camel spin because of your humps."

Sasha snorts loudly and Eren’s lips curl in a fierce look. "Humps? You mean this booty? Why you looking at my ass Kirstein?"

Jean flushes tomato red and from his vantage point on the bleachers Levi smirks. Connie and sasha are howling. "You looking at his ass though, or nah? Or nah, Kirstein?"

Eren twizzles with a flare of sass, expression sparking. "It’s alright if you looking kirstein, keep looking."

"No one wants you, Jaeger."

"Wow what a bitch."

"Pretty sure I’d rather take a blade across the face than bang with you."

"Keep talking, I'll make it happen."

Levi privately thinks that Eren and Jean have the makings of a strange, borderline romantic rivalry. He casually mentions this to Eren and gets, "Ew, why? Jean Kirstein has a face like a horse. That’s why I call him horse-stein when he isn't around."

"You call him horse-stein when he is around."

Eren shrugs. "Be that as it may."

*

“You know I’ve been telling this boy to invite you over for dinner for the past month, and he hasn’t said a word to you?” Carla Jaeger wheels herself around the table, setting sweet potatoes beside string beans and roast beef. “The past month!” Eren shrinks in his chair, fiddling with his cup , or his knife, completely unable to sit still. “You’d think he was embarrassed of me!”

“I’m not embarrassed of _you_ , Ma, I’m embarrassed of the things you could say.” Eren pleads weakly, and Levi snorts in amusement.

“Did you not want me to meet your coach? I used to be your coach you know.” Levi need only look down to guess when her coaching days ended. “Don’t you think I should approve him?”

“Ma.” Eren shoots an apologetic look at Levi, ears burning the brightest red, but Carla merely chuckles indulgently and wheels herself back into the kitchen. He’d offered to help with dinner, but had been firmly told to take a seat and make himself comfortable. He doesn’t dare offer again, not when Carla makes herself out to be quite the capable woman.

“And besides, you’re training beside your hero, aren’t you lucky?”

“Hero?” Levi repeats teasingly, raising an eyebrow at Eren who buries his face in his hands in mortification.

“Oh yes. Eren, Elbows off the table.”   She sets a large bowl of salad on the table and three different kinds of dressings. Quite the feast is laid out before them. “He used to watch every program you had, he recorded them even.”

“Ma!” Eren tries, muffled by his hands.

“He was your biggest fan. Look at him now.” She ruffles Eren’s hair, affection glowing in her eyes, and Levi is delighted to see it’s a trait son and mother share. “Look at him now, my little boy, skating with the best.”

“Hardly the best anymore, ma’am.” Levi smiles a little. “I’ll leave titles like that for Eren to take up.”

*

“So.” Levi says slowly. He’s so full he doesn’t think he could get up even if the house was on fire, draped over the arm of the sofa, his feet pressed to Eren’s  thigh. Eren grunts. “You have my old programs on film huh?”

“Oh my god.” Eren groans. Then he sits up a little straighter. “I’m not gonna be only one embarrassed here. You know some of these videos go back to the early two thousands? Okay, I’m sure there is some unflattering footage.” He slides off the sofa to rummage in a box packed tight with Disney movies and pokemon reruns. He finds one labelled Levi, 2001-2004.

Levi cringes before the film even starts, and Eren slides back onto the couch, pulling out a throw blanket to drape over their legs.

“This is one of my favourites.” Eren says reverently when Levi starts moving on screen. It’s easy to imagine Eren, small, wide eyed, staring at the screen with the exact same reverence, but it’s strange to imagine that reverence is for him. “You deserved the gold for this performance. I cheered when you got it.” he watches, enraptured. "I wish I had been there, in the crowd. I wish I’d gotten to see you perform, just once."

Eren’s reverence extends beyond mere admiration, and Levi is reminded of the first day they met in person, of the look of a devotee hearing the voice of god, feeling the holy spirit thundering through their bones. Almost as if Levi were Eren’s god. Levi can’t wrap his head around why. “You admire Erwin Smith too?”

Eren makes a throaty, offended noise. “Of course I do.”

“But not like this. Why?”

Eren looks at Levi, then turns back to the screen.  He’s blushing again. “Erwin Smith is really graceful, and powerful. But you were on this whole different level. You had this attitude, and this self assurance, and this energy. You were sorta out there, crazy, like you couldn’t be caged. And I wanted that. I loved that about you.”

Levi files this away to think on later. “Why is this past tense? Loved?”

“Because the Levi I see.” He gestures at the screen. “And the Levi I know are different.You're not just a character I constructed in my head any more. You're different. And I can’t keep loving that Levi when the one here, now, is so much more. "

Levi chuckles softly, letting his fingers trail through the soft hair at the base of eren’s neck briefly. it occurs to him to be uncomfortable, maybe, with the emotions of a fifteen year old kid, almost sixteen in another three months. “You’re gonna be a real lady killer one day, kid, you’re smooth as hell.”

He thinks about it more, and as Eren changes the dvds for the 2006 winter olympics. "Normally when you meet your heroes, you are disappointed to find out they're human."

Eren glances over his shoulder, then resumes pressing commands on the tv. "Why would I ever be disappointed with you?"

*

Levi doesn't bother arguing the coaches skate competition. Erwin turned his big blue eyes on him, and there was just no point even pretending to resist. Either way it feels good to lace up his skates and think only of being the best, of beating everyone else. He even digs out one of his old costumes.

"This is one of my favourites." Eren whispers, trailing reverent fingers over trailing bead work and loose filmy fabric, touch warm over the curve of levis bicep.

"Do you have all my outfits memorized too?"

"Only the ones I had mom make for recitals." Eren is quiet a beat, fingers stiff in the fabric, before his ears flush and he's spluttering comically, "I mean, I wasn't trying to be creepy or, I dunno, um, I thought that I’d skate as well as you if I wore costumes like yours, and they were so cool so--"

"Eren." Levi cuts in blandly, before Eren can work himself into hyperventilating. "You’re already such a degree of fanboy, you couldn't possibly do anything to surprise me." Eren groans and buries his face in his gloved hands, utterly mortified, while Levi laughs softly.

Eren, Mikasa and Annie are chosen as judges by Hanji’s magical sorting hat. She gripes the whole time that having his own pupil and his cousin on the panel tips the odds in Levi’s favour, but he just shrugs, beads rattling and catching. It wasn't his idea to use the magical sorting hat. He doesn't tell her that though she's right in regards to Eren, Mikasa is almost guaranteed to screw him on a technicality because it pleases her to watch him fail.

Erwin goes first, all power and grace and long steady lines. He gets a 26. Mike is next, leaving sprays of snow in his wake as he cut dramatic patterns on ice with flawless footwork. He gets a 25. Then Hanji, a typhoon on ice, or a shooting star spinning so fast and so hard and so gracefully as she contorts her body that the only way they can understand it is by watching the cyclones she leaves on ice. She gets a 29.

Levi doesn't know what he looks like. But he can see Eren and Mikasa when he skates past, their eyes wide and glittering. Levi hasn't seen that particular expression on Mikasa's face since he walked her through landing a toe loop, eons ago. Eren’s whole expression glimmers with a reverence one usually saves for church.

Then he’s around the rink, jumping and twirling.  He's never measured himself by Erwin’s perfect lines or hanjis tight spins or mike's delicate footwork. So he knows he no typhoon. But he makes himself something else entirely.

He gets a 24. Levi wonders, briefly, why he thought Eren would give him a ten, no questions asked, looking up at the stark black number Eren holds up. He wonders why he's surprised. Was he banking on Erens hero worship, hoping it would override his sense of duty?

He mulls this over the whole way home, driving both Mikasa and Eren. They are whispering conspiringly together in the back seat, fast friends somehow though Levi’s never seen them interact before, beyond polite "good practice." If they see each other in the door.

"I wish I could ice dance like Mike. Like, fuck Kirstein, but he's so lucky to have Mike as his coach." Eren sighs dreamily.

"Hanji's flexibility makes her lay back so impressive, she looks like a swan or something." Mikasa sighs just as dreamily. She's never been particularly good at the layback, prefers the arch of the biellmann.

"Levi’s jumps are flawless." Eren says, glancing at Levi in the rearview mirror. It’s dark, but Levi’s sure he's blushing. His gaze skitters away, back to Mikasa, who kisses her teeth. "Every time he takes off I just--"

"I know what you mean." Mikasa agrees. She crosses her arms. "His jumps are impressive. Too bad beyond that he's a loser." She says it pointedly, loud enough to be sure levi heard. Eren giggles. "One time i threw mud at him and he nearly cried."

"Oh my god, really?"

"Can you both not?" Levi sighs.

"Yeah, and this other time, we were visiting Uncle Kenny in Cuba, and there was a spider in the bathtub, and he broke his voice cause he screamed so high."

Ereb howls with laughter, and Mikasa grins deviously, shooting a look in the rearview mirror that says "ha, see if he ever respects you again."

"Tell me more, you've got to have more."

"I have embarrassing stories about Levi for days."

*

Eren is quiet most of the drive to his high school, flipping almost frantically through a history textbook and muttering acronyms beneath his breath in a last ditch attempt to memorize information for a test. Levi feels for him, really. It's hard balancing a healthy student life with being an Olympic level athlete.

“You know that cramming minutes before a test can’t possibly help you right?” Levi says, making a right hand turn, and glancing at Eren.

“Maybe not, but I can’t give up now.”

Levi snorts, “Of course you can’t.” because it's just like Eren, really, and Levi finds it downright admirable. Eren has nothing else going for him as a skater; he isn’t particularly graceful, fast, powerful, but what he lacks in talent he makes up for in hard work. He’s worlds different from Mikasa, who is close in age to him, who need only watch a technique before picking it up. “In any case, razzle dazzle ‘em.”

“Razzle what?” Eren frowns at him, lips twisted in confusion.

“Razzle dazzle, when you’re in trouble, go into your dance.” Levi says flatly. But Eren’s confused expression remains, and he sighs. “I guess that was a bit before your time. It’s from this movie called Chicago.”

“What’s it about?”

“You’ve really never seen Chicago?” Levi shakes his head. “Kids these days. Something has to be done about that.”

Eren doesn’t answer for a while, quietly skimming his text book. “Is razzle dazzle why you would always wear the most sparkly outfits?” he asks thoughtfully, folding and unfolding a page, watching increasingly familiar scenery slide past the windows.

“Sure.” Levi shrugs. “How can they see with sequins in their eyes?” he sings softly, and Eren tosses him a bewildered and delighted look, reluctant smile creasing his mouth. That isn’t the full truth of the matter though, he had just liked to be the brightest, the biggest. He wanted to jump the highest, spin the longest, sparkle like a star so that the crowd never stopped roaring, and he couldn’t even hear his own heartbeat over the crash of it in his ears.

He doesn’t explain it, but he’s sure Eren already understands.

“Good luck.” He says when he drops eren off in front of the school. “Razzle dazzle ‘em.” Eren waves, face set, jaw locked, eyes blazing. He’s ready for a battle he’s not going to win.

*

“You waiting for a written invitation?” Levi snaps from the change room door, listening to the clatter of skates and the rustle of clothes. “Hurry up, Christ, your mom wants you home by nine!”

“You started texting my mom?” Eren sounds appalled, one shoe clunking against the floor as he struggles his way into it. He dances his way into Levi’s range of view for a moment, tugging on jeans and stomping into his sneakers at the same time, so that the back crushes beneath his heel.

“Sure, she snapchats me adorable pictures of your first skating recitals. I love the beanie baby costume.” Levi retorts blandly. Eren groans loudly. “If you don’t hurry up, I’m going to ask her for that picture of you as a toddler, drooling all over yourself, your two little butt cheeks bare for all the world to see.” Eren groans again. “And I’m going to show it to Kirstein.”

“Show what to Kirstein?” Hanji chirps brightly as she passes by. She has enough decency not to try to peek around Levi, even as Eren shrieks and darts back out of sight. She looks Levi up and down. “You two are leaving really early tonight, what’s up?”

“That uncultured swine’s never seen Chicago, so we’re heading to my place to watch it.”

Hanji’s eyes twinkle. She loves Chicago. She’s the one who showed him Chicago. He instantly regrets mentioning it to her, because now he’s sure she won’t stop singing when you’re good to mama for the next three weeks. “Can we come?”

“We?” Levi repeats.

“Sure. Me. Connie. Sasha. Let Eren hang out with the rest of the team, I’m sure he doesn’t wanna sit in a sterile apartment cooped up with an old man.” Levi makes an offended noise in the back of his throat, and almost tells Hanji to screw off, because Eren loves his sterile apartment and loves being cooped up with him, grumpy old man or not.

Instead he turns to the change room. “Hear that? You wanna let this loser in on our movie night?” Eren’s quiet a moment, and Levi can imagine him wringing the fabric of his shirt, before he agrees. Hanji whoops and calls everyone to the boards.

“Movie night at Levi’s place, everyone get changed!”

“Everyone” includes Mike and his Olympic rookie Jean and Erwin with Mikasa and Annie. They cram themselves onto Levi’s sofa and floor, gorging on smart food popcorn and cheetos, just this once the coaches assure their pupils. Truth be told, Levi takes Eren out for treats far too often, but Hanji, with her knowing looks, certainly doesn’t need to know that.

There isn’t room enough for all of them in Levi’s living room; isn’t room for Eren and Jean to elbow each other viciously, or for Mikasa and Annie to sit as far as they can manage from each other, only to move closer together again. There isn’t room for Sasha’s cloud of unruly hair or Mike’s bulk but they make room in every crevice they can, pressed side to side, back to knee, elbow to elbow.

As the movie wears on, they slump into a heap. Sasha is asleep on Levi’s shoulder. He’s fairly sure she’s drooling but he doesn’t want to check. Eren’s foot is curled around his ankle in an attempt to escape Mika’s broad back. His skin is hot, Levi can feel it through his jeans, so hot he’d think Eren was running a fever.

Levi sings along to Razzle Dazzle under his breath, since no one can hear him over Hanji’s pitchy wailing and Richard Gere, but he feels Eren’s eyes on him, glinting in the light of the tv. He’s smiling slightly, and Levi looks back at him with a raised eyebrow, sings a little louder.

There isn’t enough room for  ten people in front of his TV, but he thinks there would have been too much room for two, and he’s glad of everyone’s company, of elbows jabbing ribs, if it means Eren has an excuse to slide a little closer to escape Jean’s sprawling limbs, and wrap their legs together so the length of their legs are flush from hip to ankle.

*

“I want to skate to Razzle Dazzle.” Eren announces in the car.

Levi breathes out hard through his nose. There’s a million reasons to say no. They are already in the second year of training, Eren hasn’t even mastered his long program yet, and to top it off, added the axel back in as his jump just because he could land a couple in a row without busting his face on the ice. Does he really think he can manage an entirely new routine? And who the hell does he think is going to choreograph a last minute piece to Razzle Dazzle? Levi doesn’t ask any of this though. “Of course you do.” Is all he says on the matter.

“I know I’m being a brat,” Eren tries, and Levi kisses his teeth. Good, at least he knows it. “But I really wanna skate to Razzle Dazzle.”

“Yeah, I know kid, pipe down about it.” Levi sighs.  He loosens his grip on the steering wheel, glances at Eren who pleads with him, with just his eyes and the downward curve of his mouth. “I’ll see what I can do. I won’t promise you any more than that. If I don’t find anything, you skate your original short program, understand?”

Eren beams at him gratefully.

Levi goes to Hanji. When it comes to fun, high energy routines, there’s no one better. He tells her so. “I think I’m uncomfortable with you kissing my ass.” Hanji says through a laugh, and looks Levi up and down, and then turns her attention to Eren, tea brown eyes hard, all the laughter of a second ago gone. Eren flinches. “And you. Are you sure you wouldn’t prefer skating to All that Jazz, if you want to do Chicago so badly? Razzle Dazzle is too long.  All that Jazz is easier to edit.”

“It has to be razzle dazzle.” Eren replies resolutely.

Hanji grins at him, a cat-with-a-canary smile that Levi doesn’t like the look of at all. “What an interesting coincidence that you and Levi love the same song from Chicago.” She drawls. “One could start to think you chose this song because it’s his favourite.”  Eren ducks his head to the table with a dull thunk. Levi glares at Hanji until she stops laughing. “Alright. I’ll do it. But only because you’re so adorable.”

“Thanks I think?” Eren mutters. He shoots Levi a quick glance, and Levi raises a brow at him in question. “one more thing.” He leans over the table to whisper in Hanji’s ear like a grade schooler. Hanji giggles with delight.

“A surprise huh? I can do that.”

Levi doesn’t like the sound of that at all, but if the kid’s getting what he wants, then it’s fine.

*

“Maybe I should take you straight home.” They are already in the elevator to Levi’s apartment, a schedule of programs from some of the greats on their to watch list so that Eren can study their form and technique. But Eren’s tired, rolling his shoulders, sighing and yawning in turns. “You’re too young to be creaking like that.”

“I’m alright,” Eren assures, rubbing his neck and the joint of his hip, like he can't choose which hurts more.

“Hanji’s doing quite the number on you, huh?” Levi says, letting Eren into the apartment, where he automatically crashes on the sofa, all sprawling limbs and groans of discomfort.

“No worse than you do on me.” Levi snorts at that, dropping his duffel bag in the closet. Eren looks utterly worn out, and really anything they watch tonight won't stick with Eren. He turns on some low music instead, and Eren sighs happily and nuzzles deeper into the couch.

"How about a massage?" He suggests. Eren sits up a little and blinks. Levi kisses his teeth, acutely aware that this all seems like the setup of an old school porno. "I've seen you rubbing your right leg. So either you’re sore, or you pulled a muscle and tried to hide it."

Eren flushes and sits up a bit more. "I don't think I pulled it, exactly..." He trails meekly.

"Yeah don't even try that with me." He gestures at him with his fingers. "Track pants off, get comfy." He returns to Eren with a little jar of medicated cream and plops down on the floor before erens bare legs. The skin of his thigh is paler from lack of sun, lightly covered in brown hair. "This shit smells rank, but it did wonders for my knee."

Levi does not look at Eren as he smoothes his palms along his thigh, feels his muscles tense beneath his touch as Eren sucks in a surprised little gasp and squeaks. Levi kneads deep; he's pulled muscles, and he's been where Eren is now, wound so tight he could crack. A deep groan escapes eren and he flops back against the cushions.

"Oh my god that feels so good." He sighs to the ceiling.

"Was really killing you wasn't it?" He rubs with the heels of his palms. Eren whines with discomfort, knots unwinding in his muscles."That ought to teach you. Next time tell me if it’s too much. I’m not gonna be disappointed that you aren't inhuman."

He looks up at eren when he hums dispassionately. "I dunno." Eren sighs. "I just...didn't want you to think--"

"Eren." Levi interrupts, gripping eren's knee and shaking a little until eren looks at him. "You're allowed to need a break. I catch you overworking yourself again, I'll knock you out myself, see if you like your break then."

"Ok." Eren smiles.

"Lemme wash my hands and I'll take you home."

*

He's not showing off exactly. This early, there's no one to show off to. He just needed to feel the ice beneath his skates, smooth and glass, the whip of air against his cheeks. He just needed to feel the roar again and sparkle brighter than ever. He doesn't feel like an old man trying vainly to relieve his glory days. He just feels like a shooting star.

He's not dancing any old program. There’s a mass of classical music in his head, and he changes moves as it changes tempo, slashing across the ice with cross cuts and twizzles before launching himself into an axel. He lands a quad, without the last half turn and only staggers a little on the landing.

Levi doesn't realize he has an audience until He hears solitary clapping from the boards. Eren beams at him, tears glittering in his eyes beneath the fluorescent light. It’s not quite the roar levi was imagining, but he takes a graceful bow none the less, and ignores the twinge in his knee.

"That was beautiful." Eren gasps, opening the side board to let Levi out. He pauses and wipes the snow from his blades before stepping off the ice, and grabs Eren's eagerly offered hard guards with a grunt in thanks. "I thought id never get to see you skate again, and--" Levi thinks for a horrible moment erens actually going to weep on him. "That was really beautiful. I hope someday I can do what you do. Or just watch you forever."

Maybe, Levi thinks, chugging a water bottle just to have something to do, Eren’s earnest praise is better than all the roaring of all the crowds combined. He shakes that thought loose and tosses his empty bottle into his dufflebag. "What’re you doing here so early?"

Eren shrugs and takes a seat beside him, his thigh flush with Levi’s. "Mom had to go to a physio appointment, so she dropped me off." Levi hums, watches water leak from the bottom of his hard guards, actively not thinking about  how close Eren is, or the fresh scent of his shampoo. "Do you come skate like this every morning?"

"Only on days I feel dull."

Erens look just then speaks of understanding. "You tell me whenever you’re feeling dull. I’ll come clap for you." Levi snorts, and thinks of Tinkerbell laying down dead, and all the Darling children fervently promising they do believe in fairies, willing her back to life.

*

"Okay kiddies." Hanji chirps from the international stadium front hall. It smells like rubber and sweat and the exhaust fumes of a zamboni, still doddering around the ice and leaving shiny glass smooth ice. Levi wrinkles his nose and idly examines a frayed thread in his glove. "From now on we'll be playing with the big boys in an olympic sized stadium. It’s getting to be crunch time."

Crunch time, Hanji says, but she still has her free skate wednesday cd tucked in her duffle.The olympic hopefuls look around at each other with anxiety and excitement. Eren's eyes are on fire.

As soon as the zamboni is off the ice, skaters step on. Jean audibly gulps. "What the hell do they put in the water in Germany?" His eyes are as big as saucers watching the other team skate by.

"Bigger they are." Levi mutters, and jerks his head at Eren to follow, while Hanji flounces off to talk to the other coaches. "Eren." The kid snaps to attention midway through lacing his skates. "Go make friends."

"But..." Eren looks over his shoulder at the other team already starting their warm ups, then back at Levi. "But, they're the enemy."

"Life is rarely so black and white kid." Eren finishes his skates and stands, shuffling over to the break in the boards cautiously. "It’s called good sportsmanship, and it’s a skill you’d better learn before you turn into a sore loser like Smith or Hanji."

Just then a Kanye West song blares over the sound system. Connie drops Sasha mid lift, and they both start to lose their minds, loud and obnoxious, so that the other team stares at them. Levi sighs and shoves at Eren's shoulder. "Isn't this your favourite song? Go show those kids what wednesday’s about."

"Four in the mornin and I’m zonin' they say I’m possessed, like the omen." Sasha and Connie are screaming the lyrics as loud as possible, and it rebounds off the walls. And boards and seats, making Levi’s ears ring. "I keep it three hundred like the romans, three hundred bitches, where the trojans?"

Vaguely, Levi hears the tall willowy girl on the other team say, "three hundred has nothing to do with the romans or the trojans?" The equally tall and willowy boy who is clearly her partner in their matching costume just pets her placatingly.

Eren is chatting with two little blondes on the other side if the rink, and pleased with this, Levi starts putting on his own skates to join in when free skate is over.

 

Levi sighs over his half laced skates,  considers Connie and Sasha who are trying to actively get the tall willowy boy who anxiously wrings his hands to rap, and wonders if she should go over and rescue him. He sighs again, pulls his laces tighter, and thinks he;s seriously too old for this.

*

They make plans to celebrate Eren's seventeenth birthday at home, just the three of them. Carla made him swear to it with some colourful threats. So he helps prepare for a dinner of lamb and couscous and a big bowl of stewed vegetables and chicken while eren is still at school.

"Moroccan style!" Carla chirps proudly. Levi knows from snapchat that she's been cooking all day, the house smells like turmeric and cinnamon, heavy and spicy and delicious. He only helps with the final touches, spooning stew in a large serving bowl and laying out flat bread in a steaming tower. When Carla sends him to fetch a large serving platter from the armoire, levi notices a slightly dusty picture frame sitting beside a decorative tea set. There's Carla, before she lost her legs, Eren at maybe ten or twelve, and a man.

"Eren's dad." Carla explains as she wheels up behind him. Levi grabs the platter he was sent for and starts to apologize for snooping, but carla just shrugs. "He went missing soon after this picture. I think it broke Eren's heart. For a long time we thought he left us."

"That’s...." Levi starts lamely, then shuts his mouth. "That’s hard." Because what else can he say? There's no other word for it.

"When he was little every friday, he and his dad would go up a little north african shop around the corner." Carla sighs, wringing her hands. "He still went, after. Every friday after school until the shop closed out. I think he wanted-- he hoped--"

"To find his father there?" Levi supplies. Carla nods, pats his arm, and rolls herself away to begin setting up dinner.

Eren has tears in his eyes when he sees the display waiting for him, and Levi can guess why, but he knocks ankles with him beneath the table while they sing happy birthday.

"Eren's half moroccan, you know, and he hasn't had some of these foods for a long time." Carla says over the lamb. Levi nods politely. Eren is quiet and sad and he feels like Carla’s just laid landmines in all the food, and any second he will bite down and one will go off.

"Morocco huh, you ever get to go?"

"No. My dad went all the time though."

Carla looks between them both as she pours out mint tea for everyone. "But you are learning arabic aren't you, so that you can go one day."

The tips of Eren's ears flush, and he nods shyly. It feels safer now, and Levi lets out a sound of relief, eating a spoonful of couscous.

"Have you made any friends on the other team, yet?"

Eren blinks, chews his lamb. "Uh, one. Sorta. Kid named Armin? He's not really on the team, but his cousin is. She's that blonde single skater in the white outfit."

"You made friends with her water boy, but not her?"

"She was too..." Eren searches for the word and gestures vaguely with his fork. "Nice. It was gross."

"Eren." Carla gasps.

"What? It's true. She smiled all the time, and talked in this super sweet girly little voice. And everyone on her team seems to think she's the sweetest thing since cotton candy." Eren gives an exaggerated shiver. "Gross."

*

Eren brings him a plate of curved hooks of pastry, beams at him and says, "They're called gazelle horns in arabic because of the shape." And then proceeds to eat two in short order. Levi doesn't think he can eat another bite, draped over the arm of the sofa, so he nibbles delicately on one.

"Gonna put in more videos?" Eren grunts and slides off the sofa cushion, and shoves in the first video he gets his hands on. The symbol for the olympics flashes at the start, and Levi feels his stomach drop, gazelle horn pastry suddenly tasteless as ash in his mouth.

He never actually got to see his fall. Watching the video, and what would have been the unmistakeable terror on his face, or the pain, or even just the humiliation, was too much to bear considering. Eventually he just pushed it to the back of his mind and ignored the twinge in his knee.

It takes Eren a little longer to recognize what video he's put in. When he does he stops eating to stare with horror as the music starts and on screen, Levi starts skating, trailing red streamers on his arms like dancing flames. "Oh my god this is.... I'm so sorry, do you want me to--?"

"No." Levi says simply when Eren moves to stop it, resting his hand on his shoulder to keep him in place. "Let it play." It’s about time he sees it anyway. He lets his hand stay where it is.

In the grand scheme of  things, the fall wasn't really what ended his career. At most, he only had two olympics left in him, his talent had already peaked. It's the fact that it ended at all that unsettles Levi. Whether from the fall, or simply retirement, he thinks he would still feel like this.

"You okay?" Eren whispers, nudging his thigh, touch warm and gentle. Levi is pinpointing the exact moment he realizes he can't catch himself. He hums softly in response and watches himself hit the ice knee first. His knee gives a twinge of sympathy, to remind him it is real, and he's not just watching the terrible fall happen to someone else. Eren slides off the sofa again to stop the video. "Let's do something else."

"What've you got in mind, kid?" Levi asks, playing along. He doesn’t want to spoil eren's birthday. Not when they made it over speed bumps of pain in conversation. He's not going to dump his regrets on what's supposed to be a good day.

Eren holds up his finger for patience and scurries away. When he comes back he has thick paper and a calligraphy pen. Levi joins him at the coffee table as indicated, and watches Eren uncap the pen and press it to the paper with a loose wrist. "This is L." He says, and swoops the pen on the page. "This is e." It’s almost like watching him skate, bold ink against paper like scraped ice. "V." He swoops again. "I."

"So this is how you write Levi in Arabic?" Levi holds up the paper and gently blows on the ink to dry it.

Eren nods eagerly. "I mean, sort of, english letters don't always have similar letters in arabic."

"Either way it’s Impressive. It's really beautiful."

"You can keep it if you want." Eren blushes.

"It’s your birthday kid, I'm supposed to be giving you gifts." But he will keep it. He likes the way the letters look on the page. It looks like art.

"There is one thing you can get me." Eren mumbles. Levi lifts a brow. Eren bites his lip visibly debates saying anything, and keeps going. "You didn't give me a gift so I thought... Maybe you could give me one of your old costumes."

Levi raises both brows now. "You're tripping into creepy fanboy territory, Eren, check yourself."

Eren blanches, "It's not like I'm gonna put it on a pillow with your face, or sniff it or something!" He wrings his hands. "I wanna wear it, for razzle dazzle, I wanna honour--"

"No." Eren looks up sharply, about to argue, but levi puts his hand up for silence. "Don’t get me wrong, I'll give you one of my costumes to sniff to your perverted fanboy hearts content." Eren face is almost glowing with heat as he sputters. "But you're not gonna wear it. Do you really want to put yourself in my shadow?"

"But--"

"No. Stand on your own. I know you can."

Eren droops, worrying his bottom lip. The tv glows blue on the curve of his jaw, lighting his eyes. Levi doesn't notice himself drifting closer until he can feel Eren's soft breathing against his face. He almost says something, so that he will turn and his lips will be right there--

Levi snaps hurriedly away, before Eren's eyes are back on him. "It’s getting late." He says. Eren looks like he wants to plead with Levi to stay just a little longer, like a child begging for an extended bed time. Like a child, Levi reminds himself. "Pack me some gazelle horns for the road?"

*

In retrospect, Erwin is really the worst person to ask for advice. But he sips on a beer slumped against his kitchen island and bemoans his sad fate, and unfortunate attraction.

"It’s really not that big a deal." Erwin says, munching on a snow pea. Levi glares at him. "I’m serious, it’s not. Of course you find him a little attractive. He is attractive. The fact that he literally praises the ground you walk on doesn't hurt."

"He shouldn't be attractive. He's a child. He's barely reached age of majority. He’s half my age."

Erwin shrugs, and snaps up another snow pea. "It’s not like you're a predator." Levi grunts. "I’m serious. You can find someone attractive without going to jail. It's not a crime."

"It is when they're a child!"

"You're looking at this too subjectively."

"And you're too objective." Levi gulps more beer and buries his head in his arms, breath humid against the counter top. "You really shouldn't be so cool about this. I'm a pervert. It’s sick."

Erwin shrugs. "You said it aloud, not me."

Levi lifts his head to shoot erwin a discerning look. He smiles winsomely back at him. "You're a pervert too aren't you." Erwin guffaws. "That's why you're okay with this. You better not be touching my cousin you goddamn creep! Stop laughing, it really isn't that funny."

"It really is." Erwin laughs harder.

Levi thinks he should have talked to Mike about all this.

*

Levi sees the whole thing happening before Eren even lands his lutz and only has enough time to mutter, "uh oh", before Reiner, a behemoth of a boy, checks Eren hard, sending him flying into the sideboard. Disoriented, Eren’s blades tangle and he falls face first into the ice.

"I swear to god his head bounced twice." Jean crows in horrified fascination.

"Holy shit." Reiner says, leaning down on the ice beside Eren, who does not move. "Holy shit are you okay--"

"Don't touch him." Levi snaps. It's more venomous than he intended but Reiner jerks his hand away. There's a little puddle of blood quickly growing beneath eren. "He's unresponsive, call an ambulance." He orders at random, some one, perhaps that Armin kid, hurries off to obey.

Eren wakes sometime later in the hospital. Armin is smiling on his right, and Levi scowling to his left. "Feeling any better?"  Armin asks sweetly, setting down his book. Eren groans and squeezes his eyes shut. There are two impressive lumps on the side of his head and his forehead, and his nose is still lined red where it bled all over the ice.

"I feel like I got run over by a bull."

"You got run over by reiner. Many would say it’s the same thing." Armin chuckles softly at eren's groan. "He says he's sorry, by the way."

"You're both idiots." Levi cuts in. Eren looks meek and admonished under his glare. "Why weren't you looking where you were going?" Eren shrugs and levi sighs and rubs his temple. "In other news, you missed bert spitting Rap God like he wrote it himself." Levi missed it too, sitting in the hospital by Eren's side, but he doesn’t need to know that.

"Tell me you recorded it." Eren looks around eagerly at them both. Armin nods and opens the video on his phone. Its shaky because armin was giggling, but connie drops a beat and sasha is hypeman.

"I'm beginning to feel like a rap god rap god--"  and then Bert spits all the verse like they were his own. Eren makes appropriately amazed noises, bouncing a little on the stiff, hospital mattress.

"I’m so mad i missed that!" Eren flops back once the videos ended.

"I think Bert did it to cheer you up when you got back."

"Tell him as soon as im on ice he's gotta do something old school. Like Will Smith or something."

Really, Eren ought to be more concerned about the effects his mild concussion might have on his performance, but as he laughs with Armin, Levi can see he couldn't possibly care less. After trying to get Eren to be friends with the other team, He considers this a win

*

Eren goes back to practice in a hockey helmet and is teased mercilessly by Jean. Levi tells him to ignore it and let Jean bray as loud as he wants; they can't afford for Eren to get another concussion, not this close to the olympics.

Eren doesn't even let Levi see his costume for razzle dazzle. He models his homemade costume for his long program with glee; it is green and gold beadwork on black, with delicate vines of rhinestones and sequins down the arms to hook around his middle finger, and framing his spine.

"You look like a lord of the rings elf reject." Levi says, indicating with a twirl of his finger for eren to give him a full view.

"Does that mean you don't like it?"

Levi snorts. "It means i love it."  He hums with appreciation, looks him up and down. "You look good. Carla really outdid herself." He wishes hed known about Carla Jaeger before, he wishes he could have worn her creations on ice. "Speaking of costumes, have you decided which one you want?"

"Of yours?" At Levi’s nod Eren shakes his head. "They’re so many that I don’t even have a clue." Levi draws a picture from his duffle, and holds it up. The picture is pixelly, so Eren squints. When he recognizes the costume, his eyes glimmer.

"Yeah that's what I thought, I knew you’d want that one."

"This was the world championship when you literally slayed everyone else. Oh god you still have it? And you’re giving it to me?" He looks like he’s in heaven.

"After the olympics, so you have something to look forward to." He hands Eren the picture. "Have you started packing?" Eren shakes his head.  "You only have a week left."

"So? Just need my tooth brush, some sweats and my costume. Doesn't take long."

"My first olympics, I had my bag packed a month in advance."

"Yeah, but thats cause youre anal."

*

Eren doesn't know the meaning of nervous.  He flips idly through his phone, playing some candy crush rip off game. Beside him in the aisle seat, Mikasa is coiled energy. She hates flying, so she grips the seat and murmurs song lyrics under her breath to avoid thinking about plummeting out of the sky. On his other side, Ymir flirts aggressively with Krista where she sits in front of her.

Sasha is asleep on his shoulder again. Levi wonders what it is about him that seems so damn comfortable to the girl. "Okay?" He asks Mikasa softly, and is rewarded with an unpleasant hiss. "You okay Eren?"

"Yuh-huh."  Eren grunts, and curses as he loses his level.

"You should both probably follow sasha's example and get some sleep."

"Too excited to sleep." Eren says dully, starting up a new level. Levi privately thinks if this is him excited he doesn't want to see hjn bored.

"If we die in a fiery crash I wanna know it." Mikasa hisses through clenched teeth, fingers clamped on the arm rests.

"Think happy thoughts." Levi says drolly, flicking mikasa's shoulder. "Auntie Kuchel's lemonade, Uncle Kenny nearly setting his house on fire that one time we did fireworks from the roof." Mikasa snorts. "Dream of soundly crushing Annie Leonhardt next week."

Mikasa’s eyes snap open, they are blazing, alight with competition, with a heated rivalry that straddles the border of admiration and resentment. "That’s not a dream." She says tartly. "It’s realty."

Some five rows ahead of them Annie turns to regard them coolly with a noise that is somewhere between laughter and disdain, crossing her legs as regally as a queen. Mikasa is fairly seething. "You wish, ackerman."

Levi shushes her before she can start a fight, but Annie just idly tosses her bangs and turns on an inflight movie. It’s done the trick though. Mikasa is so busy glaring daggers into Annie's head that she's forgotten her fear.

Eren makes a disinterested noise, and taps at a new game. "You and Leonhardt are like me and Horse-stein, just less yo momma jokes and more prison shanks."

"I’m pretty sure Jean wants to bang you." Mikasa retorts.

"I fail to see your point."

*

"I could feed you the company line about it not mattering who wins and loses," Hanji starts sagely, laying her hand on Sasha and then Connie's shoulders in turn. "But this isn't your little league soccer tournament, and I didn't spend four years coaching you for my health. So go out there and win mama some medals!"

They cheer, and step out onto the ice. They are second in the third set of skaters, nearing the end. Sasha trembles finely as she gets into position, draped over Connie’s bent leg. they are chatting quietly, just before the music starts, but what they might be saying is anyone’s guess. levi has a feeling it is probably the lyrics of a Kanye West song, to ease their nerves. He puts his money on gold digger. The rest of the team waits on the sidelines in their matching forest green team jackets. They wave flags and whistle and stomp.

"Please stop referring to yourself as mama." Erwin sighs with exasperation, leaning against the partition where Hanji anxiously grips the padding and bounces on the balls of her feet. Levi can almost understand her energy; it's different on this side, a mere spectator.

"Oh god they're off time already." Hanji’s fingers tangle in her hair and tug as she watches Connie lift Sasha smoothly. "Put her down gently, gently--"

"Hanji please, you're giving me heart palpitations," Levi sighs exasperatedly. "Just watch the damn thing, christ."

The rest of the team cheers at their spontaneous side by side triple axels, and Connie and Sasha are beaming as wide as oceans, spinning, twizzling, almost laughing with joy at their ridiculous choreography. Levi thinks they'd have quite the show on their hands if stuffy olympic regulations would let them skate it rap music.

*

"Singles short program is tomorrow." Levi rubs a towel through his hair, before letting it settle around his shoulders to catch water droplets. Eren grunts, flops over onto his stomach on the bed and continues playing a game. "Really? After months of secrecy, that's it?" Levi rips the phone from his and and tosses it onto the bed. “Stop acting so tough and just complain about how nervous you are, get it out of your system.”

Eren sighs, buries his head in the cool cotton sheets and breathes out heavily. “Maybe I shouldn’t have changed my program?”

“It’s a bit late for that now don’t you think?” Levi retorts dryly. he pats the back of Eren’s head placatingly, and wonders when the little fuck will leave his room, because he’s freaking exhausted. “It was something you wanted so bad, you don’t have time to regret it now.”

“Yeah, but--”

“Shut up. You told me when you first started you wanted to be worthy of the olympics, and that means not backing down after you’ve made your own choices. You wanted to skate to Razzle Dazzle, you’re gonna skate to razzle dazzle.”

Eren blinks at him a moment before his mouth curves into a small smile. “Thank you sir.”

“Yeah okay, whatever. Now get out of my room and go get some sleep. It’s gonna be a long day tomorrow.”

Eren looks up at him through his lashes, bottom lip jutted in a pout. “could i just stay a little longer? Just for a bit?”

Levi considers telling him no, of dragging him out by his ear if he has to. Then he meets his sparkly eyes again and he caves like wet cardboard. “we’ll see if theres anytjing on tv. I want you out of here by eleven at the latest.”

*

Annie’s dress sparkles pure and white, glittering all over with crystals so she looks like a diamond, or a snow queen. Beside him, Mikasa thrums with energy, hugging tight to the stuffed bear in a red scarf that was thrown to her after her gold winning performance. there’s still snow crusted on her blades, and her cheeks are a little flushed, but Levi’s pretty sure that not so much from the exertion of her program and more from the excitement of watching her rival skate.

“Fuck.” Mikasa hisses as Annie lands gracelessly from a jump.

“What happened?” Erwin hisses beside her. “What the hell?”

“Look, her boot broke--”

“How the hell is she gonna land her other jumps?”

“It looks like she doesn’t give a shit either way, she’s still going for the triple lutz.”

“Goddamn it.” Mikasa says with more venom than Levi’s heard in her voice for a long time. “Of course her boot had to go and break now, fuck!” Annie’s hand presses against the ice to save herself from toppling as she lands. She’ll have points deducted anyway, but she keeps skating, her every movement becoming clumsier with the flapping tongue of her boot and the loosened laces barely keeping it on her foot. The push off for her camel spin is weak, so she spins slowly, only growing slightly faster as she draws her leg in for a layback.

“Gotta respect the girl.” Levi says idly, crossing his arms. “She kept going.”

“Course she did. Fuck her.” Mikasa mutters darkly.

Annie finishes gracefully, arms extended, eyes closed, breathing hard. Beside Levi, Eren stands to clap and cheer as loud as he can. Levi figures Eren has all the respect in the world for people who keep going in adversity; it’s the quality Levi admires primarily in him.

*

“When I told him to break a leg, I didn't mean it literally!” Eren exclaims, eyes wide in horror as Jean hobbles around the ice through his program. “C’mon Kirstein!” Eren bellows over the boards. His voice carries even over the thunder of the music. “You can do better than that!”

It’s unclear whether Jean hears or not, but he pushes on just the same, favouring his right hip. His fall must have been even worse than it looked, which is saying plenty, because it looked downright brutal, watching his skate slide out under him on a landing, sending him crashing hip first onto the ice. To his credit, he got up when he heard Eren shouting at him then too.

Levi can’t see Jean’s face very well, but his movements imply agony. He finishes despite everything, and Eren is one of the first people out on the ice, helping him onto dry land, murmuring something encouraging, from the way Jean’s whole face crinkles like he wants to laugh.

*

Eren looks like the nineteen twenties spat him out, covered in sequins. He cheekily tips his fedora back at the audience and hooks his fingers in his over the shoulder gun holsters, getting into position. He’d said a few words to Hanji before he glided out onto the ice, and fixed Levi with a meaningful look that he hadnt attempted to decipher.  Levi leans against the padded boards, wringing the stretched wool of one of his gloves.

“Anxious?” Erwin prods from the bench. Levi makes a derisive sound and goes back to wringing his mitten. “Don't be, you know Hanji did a good job. Sit back, enjoy.”

Levi wants to make a scathing reply. Perhaps succinctly explain that Erwin can talk all the shit he likes, but if Annie or Mikasa had blind sided him with something like this, he would have fought them every step of the way. But the first jaunty notes of Razzle Dazzle hum over the sound system and his eyes are immediately riveted to Eren where he comes to life.

It's all elaborate footwork and over acting, bouncy and fun in a way Levi didn't know Eren could manage. He doesn't expect the jumps when they do come, almost in synch with the crash of cymbols in the music. He sees the axle when it's coming though, because he swings his arms through too early, just like always, before his body follows in the jump. “Fuck.” Levi hisses before erens even all the way on the ice, a couple of black sequins scraped off his pants.

For a beat or two of music Eren looks list and mortified. “C’mon you little shit, get up!” maybe Eren hears him. He throws himself into the rest of his routine. It's good, but he's lost the groove he had, the joy. He almost listlessly accepts the audience's applause.

*

Eren has tears glistening at the corner of his eyes the whole time he waits for his score, bracketed by levi and hanji on either side, Mikasa’s bear in his lap. He holds them back valiantly, manages to pretend they aren't there when the camera pans to him, so that his flushed cheeks and panting and tired smile almost look mournful.

As soon as they are ensconced in a change room levi leans back against the door and sighs. “Okay let it out.”

“I wanted it to be perfect!” Eren near wails before Levi even finishes speaking. “I wanted you to see it and be proud and love it, I wanted you to see my axle, I--” his voice doesn't waver, even when a couple of tears finally leak free. He scrubs at them, the sequins leaving behind little scratches on his cheeks. “I wanted to stand on my own just like you said, so you could see how serious I am.”

“I already know how serious you are.” levi replies gently, leaning back against the change room door. Eren's eyes sparkle, his body gleams with the tiny reflections of the sequins. When Eren looks up at him, dark eyelashes clumped with tears, levi feel his breath catch in his lungs. Oh no, he thinks.

“Not about skating, sir. Levi.”

Uh oh.

“About you.”

Stop, Levi wants to say but does not. Stop right there and don't say another syllable more. He thinks briefly that Eren's going to tear apart every wall and limit Levi’s ever had until now.

“I wanted to prove how much I like you.” Eren's cheeks flush, and when he ducks his head, Levi can see his ears are burning red too. Part of him wants to escape. The other part of him has never been that much of a coward. Eren looks up at him again and Levi feels speared through the gut like a butterfly on a pin. “how much i love you.”

“Ah.” is all Levi can think to say. His half assed response doesn’t seem to bother eren at all.

“You don't have to say anything, Levi.” he should have never told the kid to use his name all those months, years, ago, should never have removed that barrier. “Not one way or the other. I just wanted you to know.”

“I see.” Levi drawls just as lamely, uncomfortable in his own skin. He stands aside to let Eren out, and sinks onto one of the benches lining the wall, head in his hands.

*

In the two days until the singles long program, Levi only sees Eren during practice, and at Dinner in the hotel. The rest of the time he wanders the city with Armin and the others, talking and bickering and childishly full of life. Why, levi wonders bitterly, couldn't Eren have fallen for one of his teammates, and let levi remain some untouchable idol in his mind?

Why does levo have to question himself, second guess his motives, wonder if he wants Eren because eren wants him, or if it's a genuine interest.

He has the good sense not to go to Erwin about it, either way.

Mike grunts as Levi explains the whole thing, idly watching cat videos on mute as he listens. Were it anyone else, levi would be offended, but Mike's always been an odd duck. “and don't tell me its not so bad to be attracted to a child, i don't need to hear that again.”

Mike is silent a long time as he mulls the whole story over. “if you're honest with yourself, you’ll admit the potential for Eren falling in love with you was always there.”

“Sure, I guess…” Levi mumbles.

“But you didn't do anything to stop it, despite watching his feelings for you change from admiration to love. Don't you think that means that you wanted it to happen, even if it was just out of curiosity?”

“But he’s a child--!”

“And he was mature enough to understand you as a person, and not just a childhood hero. Don't you think that says a lot?”

“i--”

“he can make his own decisions, he's decided to like you. Now make yours. Your feelings matter here too. Don't give into him just because it's what he wants, and don't say no just because of expectations. No matter what you tell him, make sure its what you truly feel.”

As true as mike's advice is, levi doesn't feel any better. He mopes on Mike's bed listening to cat videos and considering his options, considering his feelings. “he's turning nineteen in two months.” levi murmurs aloud. “he’s going to university. He’d be popular there, i wouldn't want to constrict him--”

“They’ll all be popular in university.” Mike says suddenly. Levi glances up. “I don't know if you noticed, but our whole team is really attractive this year. Really, really attractive.”

“Keep your eyes off my cousin you goddamn pervert.”

*

Eren stands after checking the boots of his skates one last time, handing levi his hard guards. The announcer is giving the previous contestant his score, but Eren is only looking at him. “Levi.” he says tightly, fists clenched. “Will you go on a date with me, after this?”

Levi supposes, on one hand, it's fair of him to ask, after giving him space and time to consider everything he said. But why would he screw himself over right before a performance. He doesn't have time to mull it over though, because Eren needs to be on ice in a couple of seconds. “if you win me a medal, i'll go on a date with you.”

Eren beams, before his expression settles into the single minded frown of determination he knows so well. Erens changed, to be certain. He’s taller, narrower, that admiration and reverence no longer holds the same gleam as a worshiper in a church. To be frank, levis terrified of the way eren looks at him. “aye aye.” he gives a small salute and glides out onto the ice, the light catching the delicate patterns on his costume.

When the music starts, eren is completely different. He's all long graceful lines and movement, like a willow tree. He moves his arms just as levi taught him. He's different from the fun of his previous performance. There's a story being conveyed in the gentle sound of the music and the scrape of eren's skated on ice. In hindsight, levi still doesn't know why he was determined to mold eren into something graceful instead of intense, but he's glad he did, and he's glad it suits him so well.

The stadium is on its feet when he's finished, and eren stands in the center of it all, soaking up the roar, completely alive. He bows and grins and bows some more before skating off the ice, breathing rapidly. “not bad--” levi starts to say, except Eren’s mouth is slotted over his and his words die in his throat.

He seriously hopes the camera didn't catch that, or that Carla saw on her tv back home.

“Thank you, Levi.” Eren says when he pulls away. “Thank you for believing in me, thank you for trusting me.” he tugs his hard guards from Levi's lax grip and puts them on, dragging him to the little cubby to get his score.

Levi gets the impression that, despite everything, he won’t regret this decision.

*

Mikasa turns the gold disk over and over in her palm, stroking its grooves and the five olympic rings embossed on its front. “you look disappointed to be holding that.” levi sits down beside her. Eren’s bronze medal is draped around his neck, heavy with a promise Levi has forced himself not to regret.

“I am.” Mikasa sighs, letting the medal drop to hang around her neck.

“Is this about Leonhardt’s boot?”

“I wanted to beat her. Fair and square. I wanted to face off and see who came out on top. She might have gotten gold, I’ll never know. This medal feels cheap, if I beat her through a coincidence.”

“That's oddly moralistic of you.”

“Maybe.” Mikasa tips her head back. She turns and looks at him after a moment. “So whats up with you and Jaeger?”

“Who knows.” Levi looks at the glossy bronze finish.

“You better not fucking hurt him.” Mikasa growls. “He's too precious for this world, and deserves better than you. If you make him cry, I'll fuck you up.”

“Shouldn't you be telling this to him?”

“No. Eren’s adorable. You're a waste of oxygen.”

Levi kisses his teeth. “You're such a little shit.”

  
  



End file.
